This too will end

January 7, 2019

What an incredible year. I wanted to happy new year and most importantly to say thank you to each and every one of you who came to a gathering, a retreat, a women’s circle, a yoga class, a private session, to each and every one of you who read and shared my writing, downloaded my nidras, trusted in my offerings and supported my visions. I can't tell you how much it means to me. This year I took a chance and took Moon Forest Flow full time and thanks to the full support of all of you amazing humans I managed to survive!

 

This year I also had a big birthday and realised that I want to be a mama someday. This year I set what I thought was an impossible intention on the 1st January and it came to fruition, it was painful, crazy and deep but I enter the new year set free in a way I could never have imagined. OH the power of ritual and intent!

 

This year I followed my heart in my work and you came too ~ we went into the forest at 6am for dawn chorus in the snow, we gathered in the yurt to talk periods, we practiced in the forest and learned about birch trees, we spent 6 days in the Eden that is Cornwall and came out friends for life with matching tattoos (fern crew for life), I recorded wild nidras and you listened and responded so beautifully, I wrote my heart out and you shared yours too, we adventured on mountain bikes in the Surrey Hills (thank you Trail Unknown!) and got muddy down to our pants but loved every second and I set up a monthly community women’s circle and SO many of you keep coming back we've had to expand our space!

 

I saw my first Osprey in Snowdonia and cried. Nature never ceases to amaze me with its majestic beauty.

 

I was reminded that it’s never too late to make new friends like the ones you’ve known since you were 10 ~ some incredibly special humans came into my life this year and the ones already in it took up even more space in my heart.

 

And then I burnt out. Really, really badly. My body said no, my mind said no, my heart said no. Everything became too much and I broke. I really broke and I thought I wouldn’t be able to come back. I cancelled all my work and said no to everything I could. It felt like a disaster but it was an absolutely blessing in disguise. I came to understand the healing power of diagnosis and read books that changed my life. Knowledge is power, information is freedom and through both I came to truly know that I CAN and will heal. Winter has been a strong and undeniable call to the importance of cyclical living and a reminder than I can't override nature's calls to rest.

 

So eventually after a lot of rest and a LOT of support, I have made it out the other side and like a phoenix from the ashes here I stand. Alive and so very grateful to be so.

 

Wherever you are in your process I hope you know that this too will end. 

 

Carly x

 

 

 

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