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Using the DIY Punk Ethos to Get Creative Things Done in the Season of Motherhood

The magic of rest


I've been wrestling in my mind with what I want to pour my work energy into. It's been feeling unreachable with the pressures of full-time motherhood and new ventures I'm currently exploring. I've felt like just sacking it all off through exhaustion and in some ways I'm sure that would be smart but in others I know that my creative work enlivens me and adds to my mothering experience in ways that are important. More important perhaps than I realise.


What I need to get better at is being able to dip in and out, to work slowly, to move towards a body of work bit by bit without feeling that I must be making money from it right now (which is hard in these times of skintness). There is a financial pressure, there is a time pressure but they aren't useful. I will never create anything meaningful if I'm perpetually driven by pressure, fear, scarcity and lack.


I've been feeling overwhelmed by the projects I'd like to bring to fruition. I've not been able to see clearly how I can make it work.


Then yesterday, I wasn't thinking about any of this at all. I was just shattered and jumped on an opportunity to drop some restorative yoga into my day as Josh went to do the bins and Dolores went with him. It always takes a good 10-15 minutes to walk them round so I always grab a blanket and an eye pillow and do a legs up the sofa. No matter what else is calling me. It is always a good use of time.


As I closed by eyes my thoughts were thick and fast. A sure sign that restorative was very overdue. I let it all flow knowing that my body was processing the stress of my day with this release of rapid thought. I noticed my mind was trouble shooting. So I just let it. I wasn't trying to come up with solutions, I was just letting my mind run amok as I re-centred my awareness to my body and invited rest.


Clarity


All of a sudden I had a sudden spark of clarity.


I forget that this almost always happens in rest (and dance and walks in nature and anything other than desperately trying to think my way to a solution in my head which almost never work).


I played in a touring punk band in my early 20s. I was immersed in the punk scene and everything was DIY. This is how I met my husband Josh. We both naturally fall back on a DIY approach with everything we do. Yet I was fretting about how I would afford a programme to host a course and how I would record it all beautifully, pristinely and in an ordered manner amidst the disorder and chaos of motherhood.


Turns out I simply had unrealistic expectations that were out of alignment with who I am as a person and what my work stands for.


My insight was...


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Carly x


black and white photo of me playing bass in my punk band in my 20s

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