I went to bed feeling disheartened. Thanks to years of work, therapy, dear friends and perfectly timed books I now have the knowledge of how I can end up in emotional shut down and how to break free but there are still days where it just feels so much easier to sit in the sedatory sensations of numbness. It takes so much emotional strength to choose a different path and sometimes I just feel too tired and done to try. It feels simpler and safer to reside in the empty familiar